Ex's Wedding & Teen

See my posts above, I am not saying the teen should do this "for dad" who clearly is in the wrong here in how he has handled this entire thing.

I think it would be great if teen could move in with Con and live happily ever after. Unfortunately things are not that simple--especially in this case. I was just throwing this out there as an idea that might "satisfy" everyone--including assuaging the teen's current or future feelings of guilt if he doesn't attend. I understand that there would be some financial penalty but Con has expressed that $ is not a primary issue here.

Kid is 17. With his aunt having his back, HE should be telling his father what he wants to do. Maybe dear old dad is waiting for son to stand up for himself, maybe not. But nephew is gonna need to learn how to do so from what I've been reading about this family. Better to start now than wait and it get more and more difficult.

susan1014 said:

I don't believe that the wedding and convention are in the same part of the US.  

Yes, it was mentioned that there were airline reservations involved.

berkeley said:

I was just throwing this out there as an idea that might "satisfy" everyone--including assuaging the teen's current or future feelings of guilt if he doesn't attend. I understand that there would be some financial penalty but Con has expressed that $ is not a primary issue here.

Nobody will ever be "satisfied" in this situation. That's because all the adults involved (except con) are irrational. It's an unending situation.

I don't think any of these kids should go. Father is marrying someone he barely knows and he hasn't even introduced her to his children; that tells you most of the story right there -- it speaks volumes about him and his priorities, and no one should expect those priorities to change going forward. Step-mom-to-be apparently either knows nothing about parenting or couldn't care less how these kids are moved around as pawns in her giant wedding celebration. This is a really unsavory-sounding situation entirely of this couple's making, and the kids shouldn't have to be a part of it. Their relationship with this man already sounds deeply broken; they're going to need lots of help with all of this in the years to come whether they attend this misbegotten party or not. They are, however, lucky to have such a great aunt in their corner.